A few weeks ago, the Lord dealt with me about deleting my facebook. I have let it take up too much of my time. Time I should be spending elsewhere. =(
I had felt nudges before in the preceding weeks but was hesitant. I can keep in contact with many people that I wouldn't easily be able to otherwise. But this time it felt so easy to yield. I had no qualms, no worries, no holding back. I felt I could do it.
But then… I started thinking. I even sent up a few little thought-prayers, God is this really what you want me to do? Should I wait to make a decision?
And I reasoned myself out of it. Or rather I let the devil put some thoughts into my head. =\ I reasoned that I could hide more fb friends (having already hidden quite a few), and only keep the ones visible that I cared most about. That way I would be browsing on there less often.
But when I get on fb, I click on this and that link, and find interesting articles to read, or good music to watch. There can be good things posted on facebook!
Before I knew it, I would be on the computer 45 minutes or an hour! Often more than once a day. =(
And during these past weeks, I knew my strategy wasn't working.
"Give me a couple of weeks to pray about it.
If God has been dealing with you about it, you've prayed long enough!"
The quote above was from a sermon I heard yesterday at an all day youth meeting. There was such good preaching all day. I was getting blessed and/or convicted about something in every message! And I was feeling that nudge again. The theme recurring through each message was serving Him. Making a difference.
Building a kingdom (my girls sang
To Count for Jesus). Yielding my all to God…
I could feel myself beginning to let go.
As the day went on, I felt it more and more.
Finally, I think it had already been mentioned, but in the next-to-last message, the preacher said something about facebook. Or did he? He may have mentioned TV… but I heard “facebook.”
Again, it felt easy to yield. To give it up.
Knowing I couldn't take it back, this time I prayed and told God I would do it.
The last message was about King David needing Ornan's threshingfloor to build an altar for a burnt offering.
(
I Chronicles 21) The key phrase that stood out was, “I give it all.” (v.23)
The preacher talked about King David stopping at Ornan's house, and asking him for something. “Jesus stopped at your heart tonight! He may not pass this way again.”
And I was very glad I’d already made the decision. Years ago when my children were still very small, the Lord had dealt with me about making reading an idol. I loved to read fiction. I treasured my books. I collected them and some I even read multiple times. On several occasions, he nudged me to give them up. But I just couldn't do it.
It was a long time before I felt that nudge again. And I have been miserable for so many years. Not because of the books, but because of letting other things come between me and God. You can’t be truly happy unless you are putting Him first in your life.
Finally, nearly a year and a half ago, again I felt He was telling me to give them up. I finally did it. I actually got rid of them. And when I told
my Mom, she was so glad for me! She read fiction, too, but didn't let it come between her and God. She and my Dad had devotions every morning. First together, then they each read their Bibles separately. I knew not to call them too early, for they would just ask me to call later. =)
After my Mom passed away last August (2011), my Dad gave me a box of non-fiction Christian books. He told me Mama kept going to places that sold second-hand books and buying these for me! He asked her why she was buying all these books, and she replied, “I’m buying them for Marty!” =)
I realized not long afterwards that one reason it wasn't so hard to give up my books was that I had facebook. And TV. And Netflix. And plenty of things to do in my “spare” time. But I still wasn't reading my Bible like I should. I was doing some, but only worrying a little if I skipped days.
In April of this past year, I heard a preacher preach about vows, and how in the Bible, God wasn't blessing because of vows not kept. (Too long to go through the story here.)
I remembered when I was young, my Mom telling me it would be better to never make a vow at all, than to make one and not keep it. So I was very careful to never tell God something on which I wasn't planning to follow through!
But when I was a teenager, I did finally make one vow. I had told God I would read at least 3 chapters a day in my Bible. But I hadn't done that in a very long time. =(
In April, I started being sure to read my Bible every single day.
At first I got a lot out of what I was reading. And I read more than three chapters, sometimes quite a few. Then gradually it became something I had to do so I could say I had done it. =( I tried not to do that! But I kept reading because I had made a vow. And I had come a ways from where I was, and I didn't want to go back! But I realized something was missing because I wasn't truly putting God first. Other things “had to be done” or, like facebook, things I wanted to do.
One preacher said yesterday that some of us read our Bible like it’s an aspirin. You swallow as quickly as you can, then turn on the TV. (translation in my mind: computer).
Another message was from
James 4:4-10. Verse 8 says, “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you.”
The preacher said, “Do you want to be closer to God? Are you getting closer? It doesn't say ‘Want to be close to God and he will be close to you.' -- You have to move in his direction!”
I have made a few other changes this past year, and honestly, each time it was something I was addicted to. Something I never thought I’d give up or get rid of.
But each time it seemed almost too easy!
Quite a few times lately in my Bible reading, I have read that a battle was won because of someone preparing their heart, and inquiring of the Lord what to do.
A preacher also said that you won’t surrender things unless you've already surrendered your heart.
James 4:8 says that in order for God to draw nigh to you, first you have to draw nigh to him!
When you get close to God, the temptations from before will be less tempting.
Get the things out of our lives that prohibit us from getting closer to God, then he will draw nigh to us.
A preacher said that when you give up something, it may hurt at first. But it gets easier! And each time you give up something for the Lord, you’re taking a step toward him, and he takes a step toward you. (And that is why it gets easier.) So I guess I've been making some steps, but not really thinking of it that way. And I think that giving up my books last year was a first small step, although an imperfect step. And I know I have lots more to go! But I sure am a lot closer to Him than I have been in a long time! And the more I surrender to Him, the better it gets! And each time it gets better, I can’t imagine it could get any better than the present time. But it does!
Why am I telling you all this?
Because of another message. This one was about doing whatever it took to get to Jesus. In
Mark 5:21-34, Jairus asked for his daughter to be healed. On the way to Jairus’ house, a woman touched the hem of Jesus’ garment in order to be healed.
“For she said, If I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole.”
When Jesus asked, “Who touched my clothes?” she came forward and “told him all the truth.”
She told, in front of everyone, why she had done it.
She witnessed that she knew he could heal her, and that she pressed through the crowd to get to him.
I don’t want my unspoken testimony to keep someone else from being encouraged!
I want to tell you that if you do whatever you can to get to Jesus, you’ll have something to tell!
And I do! And I want to tell what He’s done for me!
Most of what I've written here are things preachers have said (to the best of my memory and my notes) in eight different messages I heard yesterday.
They are not mentioned here in order of the sermons, but rather pieced together as I thought of them in writing each paragraph.
But it was so amazing how every message just “fit” together! Yes, there was a given theme for the conference – Making a Difference – but what I heard all day was Surrender. But in order to make a difference, you do have to surrender!
When looking up surrender in a thesaurus, one of the definitions/synonyms was “nonresistant.”
I want to be nonresistant to what God wants me to do. And that starts in the home. Doing what I know God wants me to be doing right now. He may have something else for me to do one day. Something that right now I would think is scary! (I had to lead in a prayer room tonight. All I had to do was kind of get it started and everyone went around and gave prayer requests, but that was scary for me!)
But maybe what I may do for God one day is something quiet and un-noticeable. =)
But right now… right now I have a family. A husband and three teenagers.
I need to hit the delete button and get the things out of my life that hinder me from getting closer to God. And I will get more out of my Bible reading. And I will slowly gain a bit of wisdom. (Proverbs is a wonderful book!) And I can become a better wife and mother.
That is what He wants me to do now.
sMiLeS,
Will you give your life to Him? ♫♪
August, 2013 - Many of you know I am back on facebook, but it's different now. I waited until I was sure God was leading me that way. I mainly use facebook now to share with others things I've read or preaching messages I've listened to, etc. I do post other things as well, but fb isn't my priority anymore.